un-dis-non-un-satisfaction in the morning! slap...

hi..... nope, should be haiz......

plan to sleep till late late... but.. thanks to MUMMY@@!!! who called me and wake me up from my super sweet dreams!!! my gosh.... cuz i know, once i wake up, i hv to start worrying for my bro.

see!! it's 10 14 am now.. and u know how many things i've done to find out about the medic course in UCSI!!!! and see? my stupid bro still sleeping....ARGH!!!!

I've called a lot of places, LAN, UCSI, my uncle, my aunties, Mum,.........darn.....

and i'm still waiting for the reply from my uncle... yup, he's a doctor..

sometimes, i'm wondering, a person like my bro, this kind of attitude, how to study medic ar>?? it's like, he doesnt even bother to find everything out by himself!!! me??? hello.... i'm in my sem break la, can at least let me sleep ar??

die la..... my bro... i'm now imagining when he graduates, will he diagnose a patient wrongly ar? just like the Klinik Salina who gave the wrong med dosage to a baby... my gosh!!

haiz.. i'm sleepy now, but i cant sleep!!! cuz i need to wait for the calls and.....wake my stupid brother up.....

tak boleh harap langsung....

i dont think i dare to let him do a single injection oso.... haha!!!


i'm just spurring everything out here.. cuz me? i'm now lack of sleep, my eyes almost closed, hvn brush my teeth, and yet, i need to find out so many things!!! oh ya, the most important, i am hungry....

hungry man is an angry man... haha! me? i'm not that angry la... just tht... i dunno why i hv to do this?? it's not me who wants to study medic!!!! why must i put efforts on the things that i am not studying????
easy.....
because... he's my stupid brother.

wanna let go everything, but... tak sampai hati.

even my parents oso one more thing, the wont ask my bro to find out himself.. why? cuz they know... if he asks, it's = zero.
so......

"I'm sorry i'm bad, i'm sorry i'm blue....."
when my ringing tone rings... i know....gosh..... my sleep.. sob sob...

yup. it's true, i've answered that phone... see la, my job starts....
if i did not answer, there are more calls to come.....see? my father calls again...


haiz....


sick!! sick!!! i wish i was the sister(younger) in this family!!! haha.....

but... cant blame oso.. cuz my attitude memang bossy and degil a bit, that makes me a leader for my siblings.

like i told Stupiak Girl yesterday... cuz she seems like facing the same situation... haha!!
i told her, can a person like me really find guys that will make decision for me, protects me, and really care everything about me?

know what? i doubt le.... maybe i'll take forever to find a guy like that... haha!!! Why? cuz my attitude.. i'm very protective, (like a man? yah...), I'm stubborn and soft hearted.. things that i said i dont care, i will still care. I wont show it, but i will do it quietly..

pathetic.. pathetic..

yesterday, i thought everything will be fine this morning... mana tahu, there are more things coming to me this morning!!! hello..... me le? i know as a big sis i need to be responsible to my bro, but.... if i keep on backing him up, when is he going to be independent??? haiz......

fine la, i dunno what more to say about this.
Even my parents oso approach me and ask me everything......
well, in a way... they respect my opinion?? haha... cuz i know more than them.

but thank god, my bro still respect me la... though he knows i'm doing everything...
but... hello.. i wont be here everytime when he needs me.. i want him to learn to handle things on his own, especially his own FUTURE!!!

:-(

It's hard to be the BIG "GUY" in the family....

ok, my bro wakes up d...
at last, he wakes up at the time when it almost rain.

sweat......

know what, i wish my bro will be the ONE AND ONLY GUY IN MY LIFE with THIS KIND OF ATTITUDE .... no, i dont want more..
it feels.... pressuring, suffocating...and... worrying.

I'm always the one worrying for him le....
can someone worry for me ar?

ya la, everything... thanks to the way i'm being brought up la...
DUmbOnion really DUMB in this case...

haha......

everytime i wanna let him stumble and fall, so that he'll learn.. but i guess, his journey is smooth sailing all the while...
cuz his thinking...."nvm, anything, i can refer to jie jie.."
eh? I'm wat? walking dictionary ar?

fyuhh......

it's cool and not cool to have a bro who is going into Uni....

especially the SAME UNI!!!!!

haiz.... Since small le!!! he's "glued" to me!!! my gosh!!!

haiz... biarlah... i wanna go hang myself to death d.. wish i am Snow White, got poisoned, waiting for the REal PRINCe to kiss me and wake me up!!! then live happily ever after
but.....
in reality....
I think i'll be the one to KISS my poisoned PRince and ask him to wake up!!! the first thing i'll do? SLAP him, TURN him a few rounds!!! and yell...."eh! why must i kiss you ar? why u so stupid go n eat the poison apple??!!? u duuno how to see ar? u buta kah?"
(i sometimes treat my bro like that oso... cuz he really dunno how to judge, everyone is considered a good person to him! he do not know about imposters, bad company, and useless heart breaking friends... his view of life is so... clear and pure, no contaminants, no dirts... )

whereas mine??? i've seen through a lot of things... that's why.. i "label" my bro as.... NAIVE!! though he is a very lucky guy for being a stupid person....and happy-go-lucky. My gosh!


haha...
anyway, i hope my fairy tale will not turn up this way, if it does..then i am really pathetic...


k la... it's enough of anger and spurring, cuz... no point! i still hv to do everything for him..... haiz...

haha...


"I'm sorry i'm bad, i'm sorry i'm blue....."

my phone rang again........