Long long post... keep writing...

SCREW ME!!! I slept till 7.30am today and my class starts at 8am!! damn! haiz... thanks to me la, i slept quite late yesterday, cuz i was doing my report which will be due today..see? last minute work.. and i have another report which due on wednesday. haiz...

feel guilty cuz i didnt study this morning... so i better study later. Anyway, i'm in the library now. :-) source of books are available... so, i'll study later. hehe...

Read some funny mails from my friends... haha.. it brighthen my mood up!! cuz it's real funny lol! well, cuz i was really blur today.. i woke up late.. and since i woke up late, i took my sweet time to release my 'bomb; in the toilet, brush my teeth, eat my bfast.. by the time i finished all that, it's already 8.10am.. and waiting for the stupid lift..which is loaded. haiz... due to my 'smaller' size now, well, i still can fit into the lift without ringing any alarms.. haha! glad.

by the time i reached to the class, it's 8.30.. well, i am late, so wat? cuz normally on monday, i'll sleep in the class.. but since i slept till 7.30 today, so, i was quite awake..

actually, i already woke up at 4.30am. what i did?i wrote the discussion part of my report, i print my report, doing some touch up... then by the time i finished everything, it's already 6.oo am. so i've decided to sleep about 45 minutes so that i can wake up and wash myself up... mana tahu... i off my alarm at 6.45 and sleep till 7.30@! i got a shock actually.. hehe.. so i've decided to tk everything slow..

i really thought i was the lastest to reach... mana tahu... there's a lot of late comers also! haha.. so we entered the class together..as if we are suppose to be late, not early.. haha..
too bad, i did passive listening to the lecture.. not really listening.. cuz my eyes... they hardly open. (gosh, my eyes already so small.... ) yeah, i think the lecturer cant see my eyes!! ha!
was doing some technical approach to my phone.. haiz.. my phone... (i'm dying for Nokia 6500!!!)

now, my mood still ok ok only... i am trying my best to make use of this day. i wanted to go back and study... but now.. haiz, it seang sent me a msg informing tht there's a meeting regarding the orientation day today, in the school of pharmacy at 11am. so, as a part of the committee, i hv to be there.

Another new week... yeah, hell has begun. for me, i'll try my very best to study. as quiz is in 2 weeks time and finals is coming. so, give me some support ler... (cheers!) i hope i wont collapse this sem. like i did last sem. I really collapsed ler... at the very last 2 papers. anyway, it's over. and i've learnt my lessons. I'm going to do my best as there are more activities for me after my finals. I must do my best.

Wenn iyng told me before... it's normal for a pharmacy student to cry alone when they feel stressed... At first, i only listen. but when i enrolled, i found that it's true. yeah, no matter how tough u are, u'll still hv weak moments. (be prepared if u're going to start ur new journey of life). Degree isnt easy, it is the determinant of ur life. what u eat in the future depends on the degree. so, just try ur best. yeah, i'm trying my best.

I admit, i hv weak moments too. I cry myself sometimes. It's good when the full heavy load of stress feeling is in you, you hv to release it out. for me, i cant just 'sleep' away the stress. It doesnt work for me. Either i try to be violent or i just cry myself away. hah@! scary huh? that's why, Saturday training is the only day i can release myself. I can make full use of my energy to do difficult action. and i use my skill, love, and care to teach my fellow students. Basically, i'll have fun on saturdays. that's why, i cant afford to miss my training. I've told Julene before, if i hv passion to do something, no one can stop me. cuz i've told her that i hv to train every saturday when i first attended the job interview with her.

Guess, TKD built my personality...
i hv the full responsibility to attend and conduct classes... cuz my student's skill is in my hands.
moreover, i hv to prepare someof them for the black belt grading next month. yeah, i'm cracking my head now to built up their stamina.

well, basically... that's the way i release my stress.. and plus the earphone in my head.

( i'm real freak)... when i look back the amount of posts i've posted, i got a shock... i guess the only problem with me is... i dont hv place to throw everything out except for blogs and my lappy..plus certain person. my lappy diary folder is very full also..full of my repertoire..
cuz i dont use to say things about me to the ppl that i dont really know... they'll look liek aliens if i tell them. so, the only things i discussed with them is studies, studies, assignments... projects.. so, pity me ar? no la.. it's my choice. U can say that i am choosy.

Hello... u cant just simply tell ppl what brand of bra u're wearing to those that u dont really know and those who are not close to u rite??!!!? duh!@!!
anyway, u can try. just grab a person from nowhere and tell them :' the brand of underwear i'm wearing is XXX" see what's the person's reaction! u'll get blue black on ur eyes if u're unlucky!ha!

well, that's me. No one really knows me real well here. or i should say, no one really know me la. they only know my name.

It's a long blog, but is till wanna keep writing..

Fiona told me about she saw my frogs picture in friendster blog... well, i dont remember i've uploaded any frogs photo in friendster... haha!! anyway, ok... well... no comments. haha!@ no la, it's ok that she thought it is friendster... it's GOOD actually!!
well, i dun wanna write again what she told me.. I feel it's ridiculous le. dunno la.. I'll still wait and see.. hehe... she's right sometimes, and she's wrong sometimes. the most headache part is... she hardly listen to ppl... and she thinks that she's alwasy right. haiz.... I sometimes feel sorry for her..

It's good to step out and see things as a third party. u'll see more things.

First time i fel glad that Rae really gave some suggestion or i would say her precious view on my bro's future choice. I'm real glad. cuz wat she told me is exactly what i thought also... just that i want my brother to make up his mind himself and decide himself. I didnt do much talkin to him last few days as i came bck to klang only on saturday. well, this weekend, i dunno... I wanted to hv an appointment with Grace, annie and all of the aunties.. but i cant seem to fix my time. As julene needs ppl to work this saturday. Which is more important? or should i arrange my appointment on Friday nite?? well... i will want to consider that.. if i do it on Fri nite, both parties will be great. i get to help both parties.

i'll just consider about that...

smiling lightly... writing do help to regain myself.

It's already been one week BS is in Austrlia.. i wonder how is she.. yeas, i miss her. cuz till now, ther's no news about her ler... wondering how is she....
(wondering..) wondering is what i did if i miss anything or anyone. like everyone back in klang,Fiona,Rae, sue... my brothers,families... haha... i know i can still send msg to them anytime.. but if i've interrupted their work or date, then not good lo... so, sometimes, i just keep it in myself or in my phone. hehe....

Once again... i really hope ther's no changes in everything... I'm rEally scared...honestly... but i'm building myself up to face any changes now... It takes time, i know. but if changes do happen, i'll just accept it... i just hope to preserve the 'pureness' now.... cuz till now, everything is still pure.. I need to learn how to meand my broken heart if changes really happen... For now, i dont even dare to think about it. I just dont wanna lose the things i love and the person i love and care.
bless them... and bless me.