a lil update on my TODAY. =)

“Flames to dust, Lovers to friends, why do all good things come to an end?”

a song lyrics from Nelly Furtado. yeah, it just caught my mind.

I’m writing to keep me awake, as usual.

 

Today, it has been… good. Chatted with a few person. It does makes me feel better. I mean, yeah. I’ve not been talking to anyone else since last…week? LOLs!!!!!

owh yeah, let me share another achievement of mine today! very rare…!! don’t laugh… hehe..

i’ve lowered down my fan speed to no.2 the whole day!!! yay!!! all the while, its no.3. i thought, my heat tolerance has been getting lower and lower… so, i challenged myself today. No.2! i knw it sounds funny and absurd, hahaha!!! but.. i wanna prove to myself that i can go back to the No.2 speed! owh, i used to tune to No.2 a few years back. now, No. 3.

my challenge ends when the weather is super hot again. haha!!

 

Today, i’ve learnt one thing. The person knows clearly that you are a loving child, but.. you yourself won’t knw whether the person cares for you. Understand? haha!!! Its like… one sided kinda thing. Like i say, human are selfish, and its a skill to survive. Nothing is wrong being a selfish brat. I am selfish too.. sometimes… =)

but, i don’t feel heartbroken or what-so-ever feeling, cuz i knw… its a norm. Instead of focusing things that you might not knw you’ll have, why not focus on things that you’ve already have and give thanks to it? right? =)

Owh, I’m blessed with what i have now. =)

 

Another thing, i can’t seem to study without voice… i’ve tried, but.. it doesnt lasts long. I wonder why. .. any psychiatrist out there can help me decipher my problem? I need sounds to study! if not, i can’t!!! Why?!?!?! is it just a habit? or? my mental problem?!?!?!!!?!?!?

or maybe i’m used to it? or maybe i’m scared of silence??

nah, scared of silence? it doesnt make sense.. in fact, i love it. haha!

 

Just when i realize that i accidentally activated my FB chat just now, besides chatted with Pumpkin, Missy V nudged me and say that the next Saturday’s paper is an IMPOSSIBLE MISSION. Well, I try not to think that..  =) So, I gave her some comfort..(which i’m good at =P) True enuf, everyone is at the same level, and there’s no use questioning the school why no actions has been taken to this kind of lecturer whom failed more than 97% of the class. Sigh… i can write a whole page of angry words when i talk about it.

but then… its no use.. cuz all i can do it.. study and try my best. what’s passed is PAST! no point looking back, thinking about it.. and feel depressed. In fact, when i saw the result, i was laughing, but deep in me, i felt sad. I laughed cuz.. that was the first ever exam where almost whole class FAILED.. terribly… seriously, not fail with C-, but worse than that. Well… well….

Me, i’m just going to pray hard and study hard for it! That’s why i ask for prayers from all of you everyday.. It makes me feel better. =)

 

Let me share a few pics i’ve taken a few months ago…

 

i was at the slow lane, the weather was scorching hot that day.. but the sky was damn beautiful!!! God’s creation!!! its beautiful.. isn’t it?? Sky is the best magician ever.. even better than David Copperfield cuz you can see all sorts of things in the sky. Don’t believe, try it one day!!!

 

 

 

owh, i knw there’s a lot of SS.. but forgive me, i’m just too bored….. haha!! Just to update you guys that i am still fine, i still look good… a little dark eye bag.. which will be worsen in a few day’s time…. Overall, i’m good. =)

Time flies, i just can’t wait for next Monday, 1pm. It marks my liberty… for the next 6 months.

 

Today, everything has been wonderful to me. Things go smoothly.. i did what i liked.. Yeap, watched YouTube on the Ellen Show. Gosh, i love her! Besides, I’ve slept, sang a little, movie a little… Mmm.. what else? Studied! =)

 

ITs almost 12am now. I’m going to sleep early and wake up early. I think my body is so tired that 9 hours sleep is not sufficient for me anymore. Probably it is due to accumulation of all these months. Mmm…. the road to be a pharmacist, its seriously not easy. Everyday, I’m dealing with blood, sweat, and tears. haha… Own B.S.T, and others’ B.S.T. 

I accept the fact that we need to suffer in order to mould us to what we’re supposed to be. That is the process of life.

Life is short, appreciate it, live it. Love it. Don’t live in BLAME, don’t live in LIES, don’t live in PAIN, don’t live in VAIN.

Be the one you want yourself to be. Be true to yourself.

 

okies, time to go off! Ciao! till then!!!

 

P.S: I feel like taking a super LONG BREAK…not 6 months, but more than that. now i realized and i understand why did Rose made the decision to escape to Japan a few years back before she entered Year 4… I think i can feel her now. The pressure is rising… especially with me and everything that is still unsolved in me…. well, can i say that.. "i wanna feel and be like  powder? fine, flowable, free.. and no restriction. Wind blows, powder will be splattered around. I wanna go off from my cage.. a while..” It is stupid i knw, but i have a thought to really live like a cavemen, no phones, no laptop, nothing. yeah, best said, i need a retreat.

 

a bit outta muh mind here, but.. i’m good. =)

haha… anyway, nites peepsie! will write 2mr! =P

 

eyes closing.. surprisingly!!!! hehe….