ARGHHHHHH!!!

Better?
after my previous "bomb blog"?

Argh... Let me tell you something, it is not getting better...

I received her msg today.. :Yes, The one who is always above me but doesnt look like she is above me.

I was worrying while i'm taking my bath, and thinking about all the things that made me almost collapse. I had phobia receiving HER MSG. it makes me think of... "Gosh, have i done something wrong in LC again?"

I was like an ant, jumping on the hot pot!!!! worried like SHIT! but i think there's nothing wrong i did, i guess?? *hopefully*
true enuf... it was Her msg... of course, no mood drives me to put smileys in the msg. or even a HAHA.
Mmm, if my msg consists of both or either one, i mean it.

Sigh....
Probably it is a right decision to QUIT everything on NOVEMBER. I realized this morning that i couldnt take it anymore. CAn you imagine the stress is so strong that i can have BAD DREAMS during my SHORT NAP at 11am?
This is seriously an Invisible pressure,which i TOTALLY DON'T LIKE IT!!!!!!!!!!!
I'm sick of it.... I wish i could stop everything, Quit everything, and just lie and sleep peacefully... I miss my peaceful sleeps.
miss it lots.

Study stress contributes to my SUPER MOOD SWING.

U knw how USELESS i feel? I do not feel it so strong before...
I failed in my teaching, I failed in my work.
and i will make sure that i wont fail in my STUDY!

Pray for me, will ya?? 3rd to 13th...

In front of me is AMT, full of antibiotics facts.
In my heart and mind, full of craps, full of defeating thoughts.
Sweet talks can make me move? it is very REALISTIC because if i reject something, the atmosphere changed.. What the hell is this?
My last hug to Sheepig almost ended up with tears. I did not knw that i was still depress until i received msg from Cheang. Thanks my dear ALO!

For now, I'm not going to STEP INTO THE LOT TILL DECEMBER!!!!!!!! I'm not going to STEP INTO THE SCHOOL TILL DECEMBER!!!! I'm going to ENJOY MySELF TO THE FULLEST ON NOV!!! No more STRESS!!! No more REsponsiBILITIES!!! No more COmmITMENTS!! The only commitment i will have is towards my FAMILY and SIBLINGS! THAT"S ALL!
End-Of-STORY!

I will reject anything regarding REsponsibilities and commitmentS!!!

i say it, and i MEAN IT! owh, u so know me. that i will surely do it.
Like i say in my previous post, when a person has stayed or be in a position or a place for too long, perhaps it's time to step down or disappear or change a new environment.

Let me go through my finals before i really sit, sink, and think about it.

"Everywhere i go..." this song reminds me of DeEr, her ringtone. coincident my lappy played this song. ha ha!

I finally understand how strong the feeling of RUNAWAY can be.

Enough of blah blahs! Life has to go on, especially in memorizing all the antibiotics facts.

I promise YOU that i will PASS!!!
I will PASS!!!!


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YOU're in my sleeping, YOU're in my waking, YOU're in my laughing, YOU're in my weeping, just be my everything... be my everything..... God bless me.
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Dad and Mum,
sorry if i dun speak much today.
You knw that i dun wanna come back here if possible, but i have to.
Mum, thanks for willing to buy me anything. I knw that you wish that i would request for anything, but thanks mum, i don't need anything. Just your support will do.

I'll ask for Cheesecake from you when i'm back Mum!! thanks for offering me just now!! ;-)

The first thing i'm going to do with you, mum is... HAve Lunch in Burger King again. :-) DIn knw that you love Burger King that much.

GreenBox on 14th NOv morning. DarLeng will pay! =p HOw about a driving trip to somewhere???? Mmm...... that would be nice.=) Just Us... Us and Us only.....
P.S : dun get mad at me if you are. Accept my apology if u're mad at me. =)
P.S.S : A change of study environment 2mr. I'm going back to the place tht i used to be last sem.