erm.... whole blog is replying ur blog... haha!

well, ALOHA!! to readers... though it's only... a few.. can be counted by 2 fingers. haha!

just came back from the grading test. well, GOSH!!! I cant believe that i am so calm till the extend of conducting the toughest exam.. which is to conduct the black belts grading.. haha! I'm proud of myself!! really!!! :-) it's my first time, got recognised as a 2nd dan black belt..... and did quite well in conducting the test, at least i was not screwed by the Examiner.. haha! Damn me if i got screwed!
I'm really happy to see all of my members to day... from other schools... and had great talks with my fellow members!! :-) they are just.....

why? partly because i've known them since i was young... very young. haha!

anyway, i enjoyed it!

I feel.... no, i should say, i can feel how Rae felt when she wrote her blog on Saturday nite. I'm sorry if i've made her think sooooooooooo much.
She's kinda true that no one really has known about me well. I dunno why... I'm trying hard now to open up. so,haha.. just gimme some time,k? I'm a slow learner. really...

and one thing, i dunno why i have the ability to know a person well. me? I can talk what u talk, i can crap what u crap, i can talk anything.. just anything... i dunno why am i having this kind of ability. that's why, I can knwo a person well just by talking.
I hv the ability to sort of like " dive " into ppl's thinking... "dive" to be them... and feel how they feel.

actually, the "awkward" part Rae is feeling... i've already know that she feels not right. really. just that.. it's kinda like not right to say it out.. it feels even more awkward if u say it out. hehe.. that's what i think.

Some say i am complicated. I admit that i cant be penetrated easily.. really.

Rae said if she wanted to choose between VY and ME, she cant choose either. well, is it a good thing? haha... it reflects the importancy of me to her? well, maybe.. I wanted her to know, dont choose, as she's already hv both. so, not to worry about the choosing part. I dont want her to choose also. why? cuz a person always have a different way of treating others. so, dont choose. especially when it's me and VY. cuz we are two different ppl, with different character, with different speciality.. Hey you, dont make urself trouble by choosing. I am me, always.

About the issue that i hate coming back on weekdays is.. know why? weekdays arent mine, they are not my days. and i know i hv to at least leave something.. no.no, no. make it this way. Me and VY are different to Rae. the feeling of me and vy is totally different. so, i understand that vy can only come out after 11pm. so, like that lo. :-) nothing de la..
Actually, the things that Rae is thinking... she's indirectly penetrating into my mind. cuz the things that she thinks.. is somehow almost 80% of what i think.haha.. how true is it? i know la...

The cheese cake division..
it's other thing... but it somehow become my case... dunno why... lol!! haha!
ok la, i know that cheese cake cant be divided equally. that's why, sometimes chocolate cheese is better, why? it is still cheese cake. haha@@!! like i said, feel so kolian, so better bake a new cheese cake lo... (know that u wont understand this sentence, so just leave it.. cuz i dont understand too.. haha!)

Let me reveal what Julene told me straight after Rae left.. cuz i dont want the stupiak girl to keep thinking to the untrue stuff. wait... let me think ar... cuz i dont really really remember.. ok.. it starts with the face. haha... after she left, Julene asked :" who she went with ar? " i said :" the guy lor... that..." before i go on, Jerry said :" the guy that came during CNY la... rite?" i said :" yup." Julene said:" why u like tak mau her to go one le?" I said :" har? since when? got meh? no ar... hehe..." then the bad jerry said in Hokkien : " why she can bang on this kind of ta po ar?" haha!! i said:" jor... what this kind of ta po? maybe fate la... ha!"

then we continued with our political talk and the mango puding.. for about 20 minutes.

that's all lo.. then i chao to wait for my bro... and DT thingy happens, which i state in the previous blog.

one thing i really wanna say, dont ever feel sorry for going out with me. I pay for everything because i know u're in money crisis. and... it's my character le... I dont really let ppl pay when i go out... even though with guys.
and u're the one who paid the most for me, believe it or not. though the number is less.. but it's true. so, u can imagine la... partly because of the way i'm being brought up. The "paying" for everything thingy.. actually comes from my parents. My parents are very generous and i'm kinda like inherit this character from them. so, i dont think it's my fault la... haha!!

Dont feel wrong for being close to me. why? it's not wrong le...

What u are to me.. ?? as i said, i dont wanna categorize it.. cuz i dont exactly know the distinct word to rate what u are to me. Something special? i would say? U are someone special, someone really true, and someone i sayang like... (this is the hardest part).. (ok, mind u!! i'm not a lesbian though i said everyone is bi).. like... someone more than friends, and we hv no blood relationship. so, i dont wanna categorize lo, cuz i dunno how le... as long as i know, and as long as u know.. haiz, then ok la. haha! our relationship is really special, dont u think so? (okok... u may say no.. but i do think so..)haha!! muka temboknya..

Like i said in my previous blog, i always have the ability to make ppl feel guilty.. i'm sure i did that to u, sorry le... really sorry. I dunno why am i having this kind of ability again.. but.. i really dunno why.
but dont u worry, i tear after hearing the DT songs is not because of u la.. :-)


" i planned to visit Kuen when she's having her exams. cause i know that she will definately pressure herself till the extend that she will get gila eventually. hahhaa. i wish Vy will fetch me there. =) even if i go, it'll definately be wednesday. cause wednesday is my only OFF day. * sob sob * and, i'm not done with the scarf i planned to give to Kuen during her birthday le... so sad. i've spent months on that but i'm not done with that yet. * screw me * cause i've re-do it for three or four times already as i've missed some knits while doing it. stupid me huh? haiz."

I'm really touched by this... haha!! thanks ya....love ya so much!

but i dont hope that u'll treat me bad like u've done to wei long and kelvin lor.... :-( hehe... so, dont ever do that le... hahahaah!!

Sob sob... Kuen will not be able to online often next week... asi'll be staying at home studying... but i think i'll go to cafe to online la... cant live without blogging.. haha!

I dont wanna be your mother le.. cant i choose to be something else ar?? i know i'm old in thinking... but... sob... mother, too old d la..... sob sob...

I am already happy that i still can see u at least.... well, not everyday, but it's enough d le. That's why, weekdays arent mine. and i wont make it mine. hehe..

Dont feel sakit hati lo.. why? U can always ask me out de la.. just that i think i'm the one always asking u out.. so, sometimes feel paise... really... and i like to go out.... only at nite.. mostly la. but not good to go out every nite also...

that's the reason why i cant imagine what will happen in the next 2 months... haha! so, dont imagine lo.. hehe.. go with the flow la.

Thanks for having the heart to visit me during my exams.... really touched also. make sure u buy chao tofu before u come!! haha!!!!

Stupiak girl, dont worry too much, k>? as i wont change la.. i am still me. I hate to repeat this, cuz it makes me feel like a mother... when u hv no place to go, no place to hang on, everyone abandone u.. my open arms will be the safest thing u've ever had. I can guarantee that. :-)

Fyuh... feel so comfortable to write this out. I know I'm kinda complicated.. I know i'm that kind of moody person. but mind me, u'll know me thoroughly, one day.. cuz i wanted to open up myself to u... badly. (again, i'm not a les!) I sayang u, but not that kind of "kiss-kiss" relationship le... sweat! (dont make me think of the word of what u are to me, cuz my english not so good le...)

k la.. next week, i wont be in klang. u can always sms me when u're free.. or feel like talking...(cuz u dont feel like talking today.. so, nvm lo...:-)) or u wanna share. I will sure layan u de. hehe...
I really pray the best to u.
and of course to u and vy too.

summary: U own both. I am yours, whenever u want me...haha! U tk care... I really appreciate the time meeting u, why? cuz i know.. ok... well, i'm not sure, so, i'll just shut. live ur day to the fullest..

Lov ya!
Muacks!